I Love You More Than Read online

  “I guess I am abundantly blessed then.” Felicia declared as she made her way over to the couch where he was spread out. “Comfortable?” Although his place was sparse where furniture was concerned, Harrison had a huge sectional. It looked like it would be able to seat at least fifteen people. If not more. It was a deep sectional. They could lay side by side and still have room for one more if the pillows were removed from the back. He looked so comfortable sitting spread eagled, a foot up on his leather ottoman.

  “Not quite. I’d be more comfortable if I had something sweet and soft to cuddle up with while I take a nap.”

  “I thought you were hungry. The food is going to get cold.”

  “I am but I’m more tired than I am hungry. I know you wouldn’t understand that seeing as how you were able to sleep the day away today. I have a toaster oven. The food will be just as good when we wake up.”

  “What if I’m not sleepy?”

  Harrison flipped on the sixty-five inch curved flat screen he had mounted on the wall. Waving the remote at her like a red flag.

  “Then you can watch anything you want to watch. I have plenty of movies on my Amazon instant video account.” He sat the remote down and began removing the pillows from the back of the couch. Felicia walked over to the end of the couch where she unwound her flats. She crawled down to where Harrison was laying down and preparing the throw to put over them.

  “You’re a lazy host Mr. Kincaid,” she told him. Her voice full of laughter. “Ow!” Felicia yelped as she felt a not too gentle pinch on her bottom.

  “It makes no sense for smart ass propaganda to come out of such a sweet mouth.”

  Harrison raised over Felicia where he froze in a pushup position and stared down at her. Felicia felt her heartbeat start to quicken from his heated and intense stare.

  Sensing her discomfort at his perusal, Harrison dropped a tender sweet kiss onto her pouty lips. Letting his body fall to her left side, Harrison threw a strong muscled arm over Felicia. Pulling her into him until she was snugly fitted against him. Lying his head on her chest Harrison was unable to resist the powerful pull he felt to caress the side of his face against her breast. He made no move to do anything more than that. Two minutes later and Felicia knew with certainty that he was sleep.

  Being able to look at him as much as she wanted without his knowledge was almost too much freedom to have. Felicia rubbed her fingers through the short strands of his hair. Massaging his scalp with one had as she flipped channels with the other. Finally settling on The Color Purple, she laid back and settled in to watch the classic.

  Felicia watched patiently, waiting for her favorite part…when Ceelie almost stabbed Mister at the dinner table. Or no, was it when she was home fixin to shaaave Mister? It was too hard for her to decide which scene was the favored part. They both potentially had the same end result, Albert Johnson dead.

  ****

  The rest of the weekend was a blur. Felicia hated for it to come to an end. They napped together. Ate together. Veg’d out on the couch together. Watched Sons of Anarchy together. Felicia was now in the middle of season three. And last but not least, they slept together.

  Things were always above board with Harrison. They would make out and grope each other freely. But that’s as far as Harrison was willing to take them. Felicia was beyond horny. But she decided to sit back, let Harrison control the show and not rush things. If Harrison was fine going without, then so was she.

  She knew he still had to have some reservations where she was concerned. She still lived with her ex, how could he not? Sunday afternoon rolled around all too soon. Felicia made them a late breakfast and they decided to take an adrenaline break from SOA and watch HGTV instead.

  Felicia’s favorite show Rehab Addict was on. She LOVED old Victorian homes. What Felicia loved most about her time spent with Harrison was that they talked. Really truly talked. And he listened. They also laughed. They laughed a lot! She hadn’t realized how much laughter she’d gone without in her life these past thirteen years. Until now.

  It was as if David’s very presence just sucked the joy from her spirit. From any room and situation. To spend time with someone who was lighthearted and funny and yet not a pushover was a new experience. Someone who was so very alpha…hell, it was a new existence for Felicia. When three that afternoon rolled around, they both knew their time had come to an end. Yet neither one wanted to move or speak on it. They just laid in his California king poster bed, snuggling in silence. At the sound of her phone ringing, Felicia knew she could escape reality no longer.

  Harrison got up and went to grab her phone from the kitchen. Felicia rolled onto her back and laid motionless staring up at the ceiling. She couldn’t help but to think about what she was about to go back home to. She couldn’t wait to see her babies, but that joy would be short lived. Whenever David decided that he’d had enough of their fun. And of course because he controls the living room as if it’s his bedroom, she and the girls would have to catch up either in her bedroom or theirs.

  Felicia hadn’t realized her breathing had rapidly increased until her chest started to tighten. Making it hard for her to pull in air. Tears fell from the corners of her eyes as she realized all too late that she was having a panic attack.

  That’s the sight Harrison was treated to as he brought her the cell phone. Felicia lying on her back in the middle of his bed gasping for breath and tears streaming down her face.

  “Baby what’s wrong?” Harrison asked as he rushed to the bed. “Do I need to call you an ambulance?” Felicia shook her head no. Harrison was busy trying to wrack his brain to see if he recalled Felicia having asthma. He came up with blank.

  “Panic...attack…” Felicia managed to gasp out in between ragged pulls of air.

  “Aww shit girl! That’s nothing. You had me worried!” Felicia gave Harrison a look that asked if he was out of his mind. Laughing, Harrison quickly amended his statement. “Not that it’s nothing. But I can handle that without any problems. Come on, let’s get you to the side of the bed.”

  Felicia allowed Harrison to place his arms under her and halfway lift and pull her to the edge of the bed. Sitting her so her legs were dangling over.

  “Okay, place your head down as far as you can get it between your knees.” Once Felicia was in the position he told her to get it, he continued. “Now as slow as you can, I want you to pull in a big deep breath and try to hold it for twenty seconds.”

  It took Felicia a few tries to complete that assignment. By the time she was able to do it, her breathing was almost back to normal. Turning her head to the side, she looked at him from her contorted position.

  “Better?”

  Felicia simply nodded her head.

  “Do you want to talk about what brought this attack on?”

  “Who said anything caused it?” Felicia asked looking at Harrison with the blankest face he’d ever seen her wear.

  “Well when I left to grab your phone you were completely fine. Fast forward two minutes later and you’re damn near passing out from lack of oxygen in my bed. All because you were hyperventilating so badly you couldn’t breathe. So again, what brought the attack on?”

  Felicia faced the carpet on the hardwood floor battling back and forth with herself. Was going to open up and confess how the thought of going home, after spending the weekend with him was like walking voluntarily into the pits of hell?

  “I don’t know, I was just lying here thinking,” Felicia was cut off by the ringing phone in his hand. Harrisons other hand was soothingly rubbing Felicia’s back. Helping to calm her down. But as soon as she heard the phone start to ring, all the muscles in her body seemed to seize up. Giving him complete insight as to what just happened.

  Taking the phone from him, Felicia answered. “Hello. Hey. Yeah. No I just decided to get out and run some errands. Wasn’t sure what time you guys would be getting back.”

  It was so hard for Harrison to sit quietly while Felicia was obviously stressing over
what awaited her at home.

  “If you really need to go David you can drop the girls off to my parents. I’ll pick them up from there.”

  Felicia noticed Harrison clenching and unclenching his fists as he listened to David talk as he normally did to her. Using a loud and nasty condescending tone.

  “So do you want me to…” and just like that the line went dead. “I swear I seriously hate him sometimes.” Getting up, Felicia started to pace and dialed out. “Hey mom. Yeah David and the girls are back. I wasn’t home and now he’s pissed because he has somewhere to be. I suggested he drop them off over there and I’ll come get them. He hung up before confirming what he was going to do. If he drops them off just shoot me a text and I’ll come and pick them up.”

  Chapter Eighteen

  Despite having a rough start to their first weekend together and a rougher end, Felicia still found herself being pursued by Harrison. Between him wiring David money, her panic attack…oh don’t forget him witnessing her being verbally abused and yelled at like a child. Felicia thought all that would’ve made Harrison pull back some. But for some strange reason, if anything it seemed like he kicked his hunting skills up by a few knots.

  They had lunch together at least three times a week. Found themselves in a routine where they worked out together Monday through Saturday. It also was not uncommon for him to run into her and the girls while on their weekend outings. Of course the only polite thing to do was to invite him to tag along.

  Harrison enjoyed spending time with Elena and Dana almost as much as he enjoyed spending time alone with their mother. The girls were hilarious. Complete opposites of each other. Most times you’d find the two of them bickering or fussing with each other. They loved to compete and see who could impress Harrison the most with their knowledge of everything.

  ****

  Fall was among them and unfortunately depending what month of fall it was, it felt like early winter. Now the fun weekends spent at parks, amusement parks, swimming and any kind of outdoor activities were spent indoors. Making running into Harrison by coincidence that much harder.

  A car show was coming to town that Harrison was really excited about. A few of his old classics he’d restored and others he had worked on would be showcased. Felicia was excited to see his work as well and wanted to have the girls stay with her parents so they could make a weekend of it. Maybe she’d finally get lucky! Harrison had the resolve of a god. No matter how hot and heavy a private one on one session between them got, he was always able to stop. Felicia hated his resolve. Every time she just knew this would be it. After they attended the car show, it would be the perfect time for them to be intimate. Finally, after all this time.

  But no. Harrison had other ideas. He wanted the girls to come. Dana was currently planning to be an engineer and enjoyed talking to Harrison about cars and watching him work on the engines. Elena had a real appreciation for the candy color detail and designs on his show cars. She was her momma’s child after all, she lived and breathed anything artistic. Felicia was fine as long as they weren’t visiting another museum. She could do without that for a month or six.

  Pulling off this coup was tougher than any other they’d pulled off in the past. They finally settled for Felicia taking the car in for some service work and Harrison being on his way out to the car show. He would of course extend the invite for them to join him. Things went smoothly. Like taking candy from a baby. When the girls found out the car needed work done they were ecstatic. Dana wanted to watch Nathan work on rebuilding transmissions.

  Elena was just excited about being flattered and showered with attention from all the workers. Once that got old, she’d make her way to Joseline’s station. She was the shops graphic paint designer. Felicia was actually starting to get worried they’d be upset about not being able to stay. Pulling into the garage stall they saw that Harrison was dressed in actual clothes. Not sporting his usual jumper and on his way out, they instantly became crestfallen. When he told them where he was going and he’d love for them to join him, their plans were all forgotten.

  Flashing Felicia his dimpled smile and giving her a wink he escorted the girls to his truck. He strapped Elena into a booster that just happened to appear a couple of months back. No one commented on its appearance. Felicia looked on as Harrison talked and joked with her children. She began to look at him with an intense hunger. A hunger that would need to be fulfilled soon. This man was everything she could ever want in a man. He always saw to them before seeing to himself.

  Stepping back from the door, Harrison laughed at something Dana said and closed it. Opening the passenger side door for Felicia. He waited for her to get in. His action prompted her from the trance she seemed to be under and she walked over to him. She took her slow sweet time approaching him. All the dates/workouts at the gym were starting to pay off. Felicia was looking better than she had before she had Dana. She took time and care when she got dressed today. Wanting to please her man.

  Ha! Her man. It has been a while since she’s been able to say those words. And even longer if asking the last time she actually believed in them. Felicia wore a pair of destroyed denim jeggings and a long loose sweater that still managed to hug her breasts. Alluding to the ass and hips that resided beneath it. Once she was standing in front of him, she reached out and grabbed the hand he had out, waiting to assist her inside.

  “You look good as sin Beautiful. I’d eat your…apple any day.” She bit her lip as she looked at him. She wanted nothing more than to kiss Harrison right here, right now, in front of everyone.

  “Get in the car Felicia.” He instructed in a stern voice. He could read her intentions. She looked at his serious expression and climbed up into the passenger seat. Their routine was very familiar and comfortable. Harrison held her gaze the entire time he walked around to his side of the truck. Starting the car, Harrison slammed his door. Turning up the radio, he turned towards Felicia as he backed out of his spot.

  “And so help me if you don’t take that lip out from in between your teeth…” Felicia quickly released her lip but she had a secret smile on the inside, she knew he wasn’t as unaffected by her as he sometimes seemed.

  Chapter Nineteen

  “Felicia, where’s Dana and Elena’s lotion?” David asked as he walked into her room without knocking. Catching her just as she was just about to take off her robe. Quickly grabbing and tying it tightly around herself, she glared at David for his unwanted intrusion.

  “They don’t have any. Every time I buy them some, they waste it, spill it or whatever it is they do with it. And it’s gone in less than a week. So now they just use mine. Well I pump it for them.” Felicia knew as she said those words that the reason the girls’ lotion never lasted was because David’s cheap ass wouldn’t buy his own toiletries. Using theirs instead. Felicia was tired of it! All he did was use, use, use and occasionally beg and borrow.

  For someone who was obsessive compulsive you’d think they’d keep soap, paper towels and alcohol. Nope! Not David. He didn’t buy one thing for her household. But expected whatever he needed to be readily supplied and available for his use. If it wasn’t he’d expect for Felicia to stop on her way home from work. He expected this of her after she had worked out, picked up the girls then go to the grocery store or wherever to get what it was he needed. As soon as possible when he just came right home after work. There was a time when Felicia used to be happy to do it.

  But of late whenever he called with requests for her to stop by the store for this or that, she’d kindly and very dryly let him know she wasn’t stopping by the store on the way home. But, he could run right around the corner and pick whatever it was he needed. It was amazing to think that he existed thirty-five years before they met. Well eighteen of those he was cared for, despite what he says. But one thing was for sure, David was a city hustler thru and thru. And Felicia was tired of playing the part of his top notch bitch.

  “Oh. Well, I ran out and needed to use some of theirs.” He pr
ovided as his eyes trailed up and down her body. Making her insides crawl. Wanting to get him out of her room five minutes ago, Felicia went in her bathroom and gave David the girls’ old bottle of lotion. Felicia had picked up a bottle of lotion from the Dollar Tree just for this occasion. If his ass wanted to use Jergens then he would have to buy Jergens. Knowing he’d never do this, Felicia filled the girls’ old bottle with the Dollar Tree lotion.

  “Here you go, you can use this, just leave it in their room and I’ll get it later.”

  “Hm. Okay.” David huskily replied. “You know you’re not looking half bad lately. Looks like you’ve lost a couple of pounds. I have some extra time this morning. I can give you a massage if you would like. You look a little tense.”

  It was all Felicia could do to keep the look of disgust off her face. She knew David was full of shit. The last thing she was right now, was tense.

  “Thanks for the offer, but I’m ok.” After a couple of minutes had passed and David was still standing in her room in the same spot. She began to question if she’d spoken aloud or not. “Did you need something else?”

  “No. It’s just that it has been quite a while since we’ve had sex now that I think on it. Just wondering why that is.”

  “Well David it was bound to happen sooner or later. We haven’t been together for quite some time and I’m sure you’ve moved on. The last thing I’d want to do is step on another woman’s toes. Anything that we had in the past ran its course some time ago.”

  “So that’s the issue.” David announced as he walked towards where Felicia stood by her bed. Reaching out to caress the side of her face, he missed his mark. Felicia jerked her face out of his range.

  “You don’t need to be worried or concerned about what I do with other women. I enjoy having sex with you too. That’s all you need to be concerned with.”

  This was just one of the many times Felicia wondered to herself each day if David listened to the foolishness that came out of his mouth. What she concluded was that either he didn’t or he just didn’t care about anything other than what he wanted.